I thought the traumatic past life (past cycle?) experiences are stored in
the instinctive center - not in our essence - and when we heal them, we talk
to our instinctive center like to a little child. I would still find it
strange that I as a person would heal my essence. If I kept waking up in the
middle of the night as I sometimes do if I'm stressed, I would think that my
instinctive center has gotten alarmed for some reason that is irrelevant for
the current situation. So it's the instinctive center I would try to heal.
If I felt I must heal my essence, I would really feel myself alone in the
cold and dark! I think our essence is part of Tao and if my essence would be
injured, the whole Tao would not be whole anymore either - the dark powers
would have finally won! ;) (note, that was a joke, I don't believe in any
dark powers other than in our heads).
I think that the differences in the ways we are looking at this are, in
part, technical and semantic, but here is my thinking:
All parts of self are interconnected; we are just one thing. Our instinctive
center and personality as a whole aren't separate from our essence (or
soul--I'll use those terms interchangeably here). However, our instinctive
center is part of the personality--it is an overleaf.
At the beginning of each lifetime, the soul deposits into the instinctive
center leftover issues from previous lifetimes and perhaps cycles that it
wants to work on during this one. Past-life traumas are carried in the outer
layers of the soul, since the current personality didn't exist when the
traumas occurred. Past-cycle traumas are carried in the outer layers of the
spark, since the current essence didn't exist when they occurred.
Each part of self has many layers, like an onion; as we have more
experiences, we add more layers, like the rings of a tree, and the outermost
layers carry the most recent experiences.
The three main parts of self are:
The personality--who we are in this lifetime only.
The soul or essence--who we are in all our lifetimes during this grand cycle
The spark--who we are during all of our grand cycles.
The personality is the outer layer of the essence as a whole, just as the
essence is the outer layer of the spark as a whole. The personality gives
the essence experiences in a particular physical plane lifetime. The essence
gives the spark experiences during a particular planetary grand cycle,
including all its lifetimes and journeys through the higher planes.
In my previous post, I referred to healing something in my essence, but
sometimes "essence" is used to denote either soul or spark, since from the
personality's point of view, they are together the higher self. I was really
referring to something carried in my spark, since it occurred in a previous
The core of any part of self is what we started with. It is pure, but it
doesn't include the outer layers of experience that have added to that core.
The core of our essence is unchanging and stable, but essence as a whole is
changing with each new experience. The outer layers of the soul and the
spark can be damaged. When they are eventually healed, growth occurs--this
is a major way that growth happens. The soul carries traumas from lifetime
to lifetime like bumps in its outer layers that remain until they're worn
down through experience that brings healing and wisdom. Then, those
experiences are integrated more deeply into the self and they cease to be
Technically, essence is not part of the Tao, but an expression or "child" of
it. The spark *is* a unit of consciousness of the Tao, but part of it has
gone "seafaring" into the dimensional universe. The part of it still in the
Tao partakes of the Tao's traits of perfection and equilibrium. The part of
it playing the game of life is in movement and is therefore off balance and
Unresolved traumas incurred during this lifetime are usually carried as
frozen energy in the personality. They can hold a lot of pain for the
personality without necessarily going all that deeply and penetrating the
soul. The soul may already be strong in that area, and if the personality
lets the soul manifest, healing can come with relative ease.
On the other hand, events in this lifetime can damage the soul if the soul
isn't already strong in that area and they overwhelm the soul and
personality's ability to cope. Severe torture, for example, often leads to
at least some level of soul damage--it's hard to become so strong that
extreme pain has no lasting effect, although some souls have accomplished
However, most of a lifetime's hard knocks remain contained in the
personality either until they're healed or until after death, when the soul
integrates the personality. Then, any important issues not yet resolved or
healed are added to similar issues from other lifetimes to be worked on
later, in future lifetimes or through intensive healing work on the astral
plane. (After a long illness, my mother spent many of our years in healing
on the astral plane. Now, she's "as good as new.") Only then do they become
part of the soul--its outermost layer, which is occupied by the most recent
In past-life therapy, the most important moment in a lifetime is considered
to be the moment of death--the thoughts one has then tend to carry over into
the next lifetime, because, obviously, there is no more opportunity to work
through them at that level of self in that lifetime.
If a soul fails to clear an issue before completing a cycle, it may be
carried in a similar way into the next cycle by the spark. The core of our
spark is, again, pure--it is the part of self that can say "I am." Still,
unresolved experiences can be carried in it outside that core.
Essence doesn't need to be perfectly polished and resolved in all things in
order to be a good higher self; everything is evolving (including Michael,
incidentally). If essence already had all the answers, it wouldn't bother
incarnating. We, in fact, are all our parts of self. We are not a
personality that "has" a higher self. We *are* our higher self expressing
through our personality, which we created to expand our horizons. Each part
helps every other part on this journey. Every personality is designed,
through choices of overleaves and life situations, in part of heal and
evolve the soul. Sometimes, the personality does that consciously. On the
other hand, the soul is the part of self carrying most of our past
experience and usually has the wisdom to guide us in the big picture
choices. The soul is parent to the personality; sometimes children heal and
guide their parents.
Talking to any wounded part of self as a nurturing parent would to a child
can be appropriate. However, when I was working with the part of my essence
carrying some misguided beliefs about my responsibility, it was more a
matter of shining new light on an experience that had not been properly
examined before. Whereas emotional wounds need nurturing, intellectual
disturbances need explication (and energetic/physical blocks need movement).
Of course, most issues contain a combination.
Waking in the middle of the night could certainly be caused by a disruption
of the instinctive center, such as survival fears being stirred up. These
could be aggravated by resonant past-life memories also being stirred up.
However, the buzzing I experienced from an old, deeply held belief
originated in a previous cycle and came directly through my essence.
"We're all in this together" applies internally as well as externally.
All the best,